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Montie Slavin's avatar

I do like the way you are introducing us to your characters. I find that getting to know them in this more introspective way is whetting my appetite for more. I am not so curious about the arc of the story as I am about the people I am getting to know. Keep layering it all in, weaving the people in with the community and the land. Nice!

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Colleen Bent's avatar

Hi, Marylee, I love the photo! Fun and inviting...The story progresses. If I might make a small suggestion...when stuff is happening and the story characters get excited, people don't often talk in complete sentences. They often interrupt each other as opposed to waiting for the speaker to finish a thought. It's a suggestion only....I'm enjoying your story....

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